Coffee Klatch

Bryan and I flew to the states on Monday. Here are just a few observations from our trip:

First, airplane food is really not healthy at all! I was shocked by all the preservatives that were in this simple sandwich:

Second, is it really necessary to give everyone an individual waste bag with their meal? Doesn’t this just create more waste on top of the mountain of waste created by the airlines by individually wrapping EVERYTHING.

Third, I like the new London Heathrow terminal. It’s bright and clean and feels very open, there’s lots of seating, lots of shops (though they are RIDICULOUSLY expensive!), lots of restaurants, etc. This was our second time to experience it and, well, I like it.

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany Stedman

photographs by Beth Stedmany

I have shared here before about how I am looking for ways to tangibly enter into and experience the church seasons. I shared some ways I plan on doing that for Advent and I wanted to share with you some of the ideas and thoughts I am having about Christmas.

We’ve all heard the song The 12 Days of Christmas, but honestly I didn’t really know until recently that the Christmas season is actually 12 days long starting on December 25^th and lasting until Epiphany on January 6^th. It makes sense to me that such a significant celebration as that which remembers the incarnation of the God of the universe should last for more than just a day. So, this year I would like to really celebrate for all 12 days. I’m still figuring out what that will look like but here are a few ideas that my friend, Tara, shared with me:

-          On the 25^th they aren’t going to give any gifts and instead they will have a family time of remembering and celebrating Jesus birth. Then they will give each child one gift on each of the next 11 days of Christmas.

-          Last year they wrapped up 12 Christmas books and the family opened one on each of the 12 days of Christmas.

-          They are going to place the 3 wise men from their nativity on the other end of the house and each day of Christmas move them a little closer to the nativity until they “arrive” at the nativity on January 6^th, Epiphany.

I love these ideas so much and really appreciate Tara’s creativity and heart for engaging authentically in the seasons of the Church calendar. So, Bryan and I have been talking about what things make sense for us to do as a unique couple, in the situation and place and time that we currently find ourselves. I think I have also been convicted lately by the ridiculous amount of money that gets spent on Christmas gifts which so often wind up broken or forgotten within a matter of weeks. Here’s a great and challenging video from Advent Conspiracy:

That video makes me get all choked up every time I watch it. So, along those lines here are some ways we have been talking about entering into the real soul of the Christmas season this year:

-          One idea we had was to give something to someone each of the 12 days of Christmas. That might mean making a meal for someone who needs it, or donating to a charity (like Living Water http://www.water.cc/), or spending time volunteering, or something else. Basically just giving something of ourselves, above and beyond the norm, on each of the 12 days of Christmas. This would be a way for us to remember how much God gave and gave up for us through his incarnation.

-          Another idea we had was asking that others who would normally give us gifts for Christmas (our parents, grandparents, etc.) donate to a charity of our choosing instead. This was sounding like a really good idea up until our own financial situation got so tight recently. Now I’m thinking that some really practical gifts from parents and grandparents are sounding pretty good. But, honestly then I remember that even with things being tight for us right now, so many people have it so much worse than us and I think that even the things that I “need” right now I don’t really need.

-          We have also talked about telling our friends and family that we won’t be giving any Christmas gifts this year or that we will just be making very simple homemade gifts. I have started going to a knitting group recently and so making simple scarves and that sort of thing for family is most likely the most we will give anyone this year.

-          We have also decided that we won’t give each other gifts this year, or at least not anything that costs money.

Over all, Bryan and I have been in agreement that we want to spend less this year, give more, and also really engage in the full season of Christmas. We still aren’t sure what that will look like for us this year, but those are just a few ideas that we have been bouncing around. I am really excited about some of these ideas and feel like they fit well with where we are at right now and what God is currently calling us to, but I do have some hesitation and fear that I have recently noticed as I have thought through these ideas.

Bryan and I will be alone for Christmas and if we don’t give each other gifts and ask others not to give us any gifts, well, then how will Christmas be really any different than any other day? I love the idea of downsizing Christmas, of not spending as much and giving to charities instead. But, honestly, the thing that really makes Christmas special is first of all being with family and the second thing that seems to make Christmas stand out from just a normal family dinner is giving gifts to those you love and watching them open them and also getting gifts from people who love you and feeling loved through their giving. Maybe that sounds bad and just reveals the consumerist mindset that I have bought into, but really the question I have found myself asking lately is what can we do now to make Christmas special, unique, different from a normal day and dinner, different from even a normal dinner party (if we choose to be with friends here on Christmas)? And how do we make all 12 of those days special, and festive and truly celebratory? Those are the questions that I have been thinking about lately… so, anyone have any ideas? I’d love to hear what you and your family are doing for Christmas this year and how you are engaging in the birth of Christ.

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany

Ok, so Amber at Home School Diva challenged people today to put up their favorite picture from the week and then leave her a comment so that we can all see the pictures people put up. So, here’s my picture for Amber’s Photo Friday:

I took this on Tuesday right before the table filled with two communities who didn’t know each other but who shared a common bond coming together and laughing, sharing stories and even a little bit of preaching together. You see the week before a few of my friends had gone to see the Harlem Gospel Choir perform and afterwards they had gone up and met them during the autograph signing time. Later that night they ran into them out on the town and ended up talking and sharing God stories with this wonderfully talented choir for hours. So, on Tuesday my friend Carrie had the choir and a bunch of friends over for dinner. It was an evening I will not quickly forget.

I hope you all have spontaneous dinners with people who you share a common bond with. I hope you all have tables filled with laughter and shared stories and even on occasion a little good old fashioned preaching J

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany

Last night my parents and my husband’s parents graciously bought us tickets to go back to the states for Thanksgiving. We leave on Monday and will spend a week in Seattle and about a week in Arizona and then be back in Prague on the 2^nd of December. It’s really last minute and I’m still sort of in shock. My head is swimming with all that I have to do in the 3 days before we leave. But, we are so excited to get to see friends and family and to just be in the states for a little bit.

Today I was meeting with a friend and talking through some stuff that has to get done before we leave and also getting some advice about support raising while we are back in the states and at one point she stopped the conversation and basically shared with me that she saw and heard that this trip needed to be a time of Rest and Receiving for Bryan and I. It suddenly dawned on me how little rest I have felt lately and how difficult it is for me to receive from God and from other people.

The past few weeks in Prague have been really difficult for me in many ways. I have known and experienced for a long time that Prague is a very dark place physically and spiritually and emotionally. But, the past few weeks I have FELT that darkness like never before.

In the past few weeks and months I have also seen more clearly and more tangibly then ever brilliant and radiant rays of Light and Hope. I have experienced God’s spirit at work in his people and have seen him piercing this darkness and speaking his truth.

…but, even with those rays of light, there is still so much darkness, and it has weighed down on me lately.

As my friend spoke truth to me and called me into God’s perfect rest I suddenly felt this growing peace and excitement about this trip back to the states. It really dawned on me and I really felt that for two weeks I won’t be here in Prague and even as I felt sad that I would be missing out on being a part of the rays of light God will bring in those two weeks I also felt relief and freedom that for a few days I won’t be under this same cloud of darkness and I can rest. It felt good to know that rest is coming and that I can trust that God will restore me so that I can come back to Prague energized and rested, with renewed passion and energy for bringing his Light to this dark city.

It also felt good to realize that I would be with family and friends who have known me and loved me for a very long time. And even though receiving and allowing others to support and love me has been a continual struggle for me, in this moment I feel such a deep need of others support and love that I feel like I am ready to receive and to relax into the ways that God wants to build me up through his body. I feel ready to let people in, ready to let them know that I need them desperately, and ready to accept whatever forms of love and grace God may direct them to give to my husband and I.

Lord, bring deep rest and restoration through this trip. And Father, teach me to, with open hands, receive your love and blessing through your people. In Jesus Name, Amen.

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany Stedman

Word of God creating
Light, where once was darkness
Searching for my true soul
Obey, now, and take heed

God among the people,
Revealed at last His glory
Speaking to my blind heard,
Lamb of God to bleed.

Light amidst the darkness
Bright against the black sky
Reaching toward my lost soul
Speaking Life indeed.

Thunder in the desert
Echos through the canyon
Pulling at my dry heart
Calling out my need

Wine from not but water,
Deep and rich and flowing
Whispers to my parched heart,
Celebrate this seed

Friend cries out in triumph
“Come and see the savior!”
Tugging at my poor soul,
“Come, friend, come and see.”

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany Stedman

Yesterday I realized something…

Let me set the stage: I was making lunch for a community gathering/retreat we were having. I had all these thoughts bouncing in my head about the communion experience I was helping to plan and about our community and what it means to live in community. I was feeling nervous about the time we were going to have together. The culmination of all this was the thought that would lead to my realization:

 “This is my body broken for you.”

With each tear of the lettuce and each cut of the knife the thought came:

“This is my body broken for you.”

As I set out the elements for communion:

“This is my body broken for you.”

And then I started to think about and pray for different members of our faith community the thought came again even louder this time:

“This is my body broken for you.”

I had never before thought about that statement as being about anything besides the bread of communion and Jesus own physical body broken on the cross. But suddenly it dawned on me that we have TWO things that we are told ARE the body of Christ Jesus: the bread at communion and the church (or the family of God). And it suddenly felt very real to me that when Jesus says, “This is my body broken for you” He is talking about how he himself will be broken, and about how the bread will be broken, AND about how his church and the members of his church will be broken. And this weekend I experienced that a little bit.

I feel like I experienced my brokenness and my past story and my personal expectations rub up against the brokenness and past stories and expectations of others in my community.

And it hurt…

… but today I find myself thanking God for it.

Thank you, Lord that I am part of your broken body!

Thank you for the darkness and the tension and the differences.

Thank you for hurting me so that I could more clearly see my own biases and brokenness.

Thank you for a community that is willing to be open with one another, and share our hearts and hurts with each other even when that’s really hard and when doing it might be really difficult.

Thank you for a community that is willing to love each other, and love the differences we see in each other even when those differences hurt us.

Thank you for a community that is willing to stay in it together instead of choosing the easier path.

Lord, thank you, thank you, thank you, for sending your son to be broken like we are.

Lord, I know and I trust that you are a God of restoration and redemption and resurrection. I know and trust that you love to take that which is broken and make it whole again. That’s what I see you being about and that is what I want to be about. Lord, forgive me for the ways that I have broken instead of redeemed, forgive me for the ways I have done that even tonight. Lord, continue to work in me - don’t give up on me - work in me to take all my broken pieces and make me whole. Lord, work in us as a community and make us whole. Make us a community that is about restoration and redemption and resurrection.

Tonight I still feel a bit sad and tired, but I also feel deep hope.

Tonight I was reminded of why I choose to be a part of this community, and why I love each of the unique members of this community.

Tonight I experienced more of what it means to actually live in real community.

Tonight I feel thankful.

Tonight I am encouraged to be part of God’s broken body and I look expectantly towards the resurrection and wholeness that is coming.

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany

Tonight I experienced this truth: Living in real community with other people can be more than just messy, it can be painful.

Tonight I felt really disappointed, sad and even angry.

Tonight I cried uncontrollably on a crowded public bus.

Tonight I feel exhausted.

Tonight I ask that you would pray that I would be able to respond in grace and love, while also being honest and authentic.

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany

A few friends came over tonight for some yoga and prayer time. Here’s what we did:

Savasana (Corpse Pose)

As you lay in corpse pose and remember that all love comes first from God, we love because he first loved us. “How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!” let those words sink into your body and soul. God loves you. You are his child. Read 1 John 4:7-12 and 16.

Music: listen to the hymn “Here is Love”. (Throughout the rest of the time listen to wordless instrumental music).

Seated in cross legged easy pose, bound angle pose, or half lotus pose. Focus on breath for a few moments. On exhale imagine yourself letting go of and exhaling all the tension and negative thoughts that you feel towards yourself and others. Let go of your fear. Let go of your anger. Let go of your greed. Let go of your jealousy. Let go of your aversion. On your inhale imagine bringing into yourself and filling yourself with positive thoughts and feelings. Fill your mind with love. Fill your mind with kindness. Fill your mind with peace. Fill your mind with patience. Fill your mind with gentleness. Allow yourself to really feel these feelings of loving kindness. Now bring your awareness and attention to the center of your chest as if you are taking all of these positive feelings and emotions into your heart.

“May thoughts of loving friendliness embrace me and envelope me.
May every cell, every drop of blood, every atom, every molecule of my entire body and mind be charged with thoughts of friendliness. May I relax my body. May I relax my mind. May my mind and body be filled with the thought of loving friendliness. May peace and tranquility pervade my entire being.”

Tadasana (Mountain Pose)

May I be at peace
May my heart remain open
May I be free
May I be safe from inner and outer harm.
May I have no place in my heart for greed, anger, aversion, hatred, jealousy, and fear
May I be filled with compassion, sympathy and joy
May I have benevolence towards all living beings, joy at the sight of the virtuous, compassion and sympathy for the afflicted, and tolerance towards the indolent and ill-behaved.

Sun Salutation (2 complete sets)

Tadasana (Mountain Pose)

Think now of someone who it is easy for you to feel love towards:

May they be at peace
May their heart remain open
May they be free
May they be safe from inner and outer harm.
May they have no place in their heart for greed, anger, aversion, hatred, jealousy, and fear
May they be filled with compassion, sympathy and joy
May they have benevolence towards all living beings, joy at the sight of the virtuous, compassion and sympathy for the afflicted, and tolerance towards the indolent and ill-behaved.

Tadasana

Warrior I

Warrior II

Reversed Warrior II

Extended side angle pose

Warrior II

Triangle Pose

Tadasana

(Repeat last 7 poses on the other side)

Bring your attention to a person you are neutral towards, someone that you don’t know well or don’t have any strong feelings towards:

May they be at peace
May their heart remain open
May they be free
May they be safe from inner and outer harm.
May they have no place in their heart for greed, anger, aversion, hatred, jealousy, and fear
May they be filled with compassion, sympathy and joy
May they have benevolence towards all living beings, joy at the sight of the virtuous, compassion and sympathy for the afflicted, and tolerance towards the indolent and ill-behaved.

Tadasana

Chair Pose

Tree Pose

Wide Legged forward bend 

Sun salutation (1 set)

Tadasana (Mountain Pose)

Hero pose

Now think of someone for whom it is difficult for you to feel love towards, maybe a true enemy or maybe just someone that you don’t get along well with. Picture that person as you send this blessing toward them:

May they be at peace
May their heart remain open
May they be free
May they be safe from inner and outer harm.
May they have no place in their heart for greed, anger, aversion, hatred, jealousy, and fear
May they be filled with compassion, sympathy and joy
May they have benevolence towards all living beings, joy at the sight of the virtuous, compassion and sympathy for the afflicted, and tolerance towards the indolent and ill-behaved.

Bharadvaja’s Twist (to both sides)

Seated Forward bend

Bridge pose

Reclining Twists

Savasana (Corpse Pose)

May my mind be filled with the thoughts of loving friendliness, compassion, appreciative joy, and equanimity. May I be generous. May I be gentle. May I be relaxed. May I be happy and peaceful. May I be healthy. May my heart become soft. May my words be pleasing to others. May my actions be kind.

May all that I see, hear, smell, taste, touch, and think help me to cultivate loving friendliness, compassion, appreciative joy, and equanimity. May all these experiences help me to cultivate thoughts of generosity and gentleness. May they all help me to relax. May they inspire friendly behavior. May these experiences be a source of peace and happiness. May they help me to be free from fear, tension, anxiety, worry, and restlessness.

No matter where I go in the world, in any direction, may I greet people with happiness, peace, and friendliness. May I be protected in all directions from greed, anger, aversion, hatred, jealousy, and fear.

Listen to the song Grace and Peace (2 Thessalonians 1:2) by Fernando Ortega.

Sit up to easy cross legged pose, bound angle pose, or half lotus.

Read the universal Metta meditation from the book Mindfulness in Plain English (page 195 in my copy).

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany Stedman

There’s been a lot said in the blog world over the last few days about the election. Some are rejoicing, some are mourning, some are criticizing and some are honestly processing. Today I feel thankful that most of the people I choose to surround myself with have been thoughtful and compassionate throughout this election and continue to be so now at the close of it.

Last night we spoke briefly at bible study about the election and we started to talk about how “terrible” it can be when Christians so vehemently and even hatefully attack the “other side.” But, as we talked I (we) were reminded that when we talk about others like that then we are no different. I was reminded that some people don’t have the same world view I do, they read scripture differently and they come to different conclusions, and that is ok. The same God works in them. They are loved and cherished deeply. I often fall into feeling superior and criticizing the “stupidity” I see around me, but in doing so I am not showing love, I am not acting as Christ calls me to act. So, forgive me Lord, and change me, help me to love like you love. Help me to be able to really see and understand and have compassion and love for those who are different from me and those who think differently from me. In Jesus name.

Ok, so I know I’ve done a lot of linking lately but here are some posts about the election and its outcome that I thought I’d share:

The Element blog page had some good things to say about this election and people’s responses to it. I especially liked Chad Demiguel’s post entitled, After the fact.  He writes,

“As children of God, our response to the world should always be one of faith, hope and love. Let’s be proactive about praying for this next president, whoever he is. Let’s honor our leader in how we discuss him in conversation with others, especially if we disagree with him. Let’s be the kind of citizens that inspire those who don’t know God toward citizenship in the City of God. If for whatever reason we experience the best or worst four years our country has ever seen, let’s do what Martin Luther prescribes. Let’s plant a tree – meaning, let’s daily create God-inspired aspects of His kingdom. Let’s constantly, lovingly be on the lookout for how we can bestow life to a country that needs it so greatly.”

Sean and CJ Bergemen also shared some revealing and insightful thoughts on the Element blog in their posts, My Heart on 11.05.08 – Part 1 and My Heart as well. CJ writes,

“He is glorified when we take hold of every action and every deed. When we show restraint with our words. When we use our words to build each other up, when we don’t assume that everyone does or should believe everything we believe. I wrestled over my decision up until the last second of voting, and asked God to direct me the entire way… The more I thought and prayed about it, the more compelled I felt to be less sure that any opinion I have truly is the ‘right’ one, the one that honors God the most. I will continue to carry a sense in my heart that I may have made the wrong choice, which will remind me that ultimately Jesus is always the right choice, and praise God He is on the throne, and not me, and not a politician.”

I appreciated this post by Jeremy at A Mending Shift, Hope vs. Fear.

Here is a Prayer for President elect Obama from Sally Coleman at Eternal Echoes.

Here’s A Prayer from South Africa for Barack Obama.

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany Stedman

This month’s synchroblog is on leadership, an appropriate topic for today. But, as I thought of what to write I realized that so much has already been said on the subject and so much more will be said… So, today I want to give you a little mosaic sampling of what has been said on leadership and what others are saying today on leadership.  I hope that you find it thought provoking.

“When kings the sword of justice first lay down, They are no kings, though they possess the crown. Titles are shadows, crowns are empty things, The good of subjects is the end of kings.” – Defoe

“We may please ourselves with the prospect of free and popular governments. But there is great danger that those governments will not make us happy. God grant they may. But I fear that in every assembly, members will obtain an influence [leadership] by noise not sense. By meanness, not greatness. By ignorance, not learning. By contracted hearts, not large souls… There is one thing, my dear sir, that must be attempted and most sacredly observed or we are all undone. There must be decency and respect, and veneration introduced for persons o authority or every rank, or we are undone. In a popular government, this is our only way.” – John Adams

“He seeks information from all quarters and judges more independently than any man I ever saw.” – John Adams speaking of George Washington (those are traits that I personally look for in a leader)

“Never give a sword to a man who can’t dance.” – Celtic saying

“To lead people, walk beside them… As for the best leaders, the people do not notice their existence. The next best, the people honor and praise. The next, the people fear, and the next, the people hate… When the best leader’s work is done the people say, ‘We did it ourselves!’” – Lao-tsu

“You do not lead by hitting people over the head – that’s assault, not leadership.” – Dwight D. Eisenhower

“Strange as it sounds, great leaders gain authority by giving it away.” – Admiral James B. Stockdale

“Progress occurs when courageous, skillful leaders seize the opportunity to change things for the better.” – Harry Truman

“The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality. The last is to say thank you. In between, the leader is a servant.” – Max DePree

“Our chief want is someone who will inspire us to be what we know we could be.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“A leader takes people where they want to go. A great leader takes people where they don’t necessarily want to go, but ought to be.” – Rosalynn Carter

“Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man’s character, give him power.” – Abraham Lincoln

 “If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.” – John Quincy Adams

 Here’s what other people are saying about leadership:

Jonathan Brink - Letter To The President

Adam Gonnerman - Aspiring to the Episcopate

Kai - Leadership - Is Servant Leadership a Broken Model?

Sally Coleman - In the world but not of it- servant leadership for the 21st Century Church

Alan Knox - Submission is given not taken

Joe Miller - Elders Lead a Healthy Family: The Future

Cobus van Wyngaard - Empowering leadership

Steve Hayes - Servant leadership

Geoff Matheson - Leadership

John Smulo - Australian Leadership Lessons

Helen Mildenhall - Leadership

Tyler Savage - Moral Leadership - Is it what we need?

Bryan Riley - Leading is to Listen and Obey

Susan Barnes - Give someone else a turn!

Liz Dyer - A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Polls…

Ellen Haroutunian - A New Kind of Leadership

Matt Stone - Converting Leadership

Steve Bradley - Lording or Leading?

Adam Myers - Two types of Leadership

Kathy Escobar - I’m Pretty Sure This Book Won’t Make It On The Bestseller List

Fuzzy Orthodoxy - Self Leadership

Sonja Andrews - Leadership In An Age of Cholera

Tara Hull - Leadership & Being A Single Mom

Beth Patterson - Leadership: Being the River

Bill Ellis - Spiritual Leadership and the re-humanizing of our world

Joe S. - Leadership: This election and social justice

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany Stedman